sleep

the perseids are supposed to peak the night of august 12 or super early the 13th of august.

i'm hoping i can venture out to our remote observatory to view them and do 'experiments' with the rest of the gang, but it doesn't look like i'll be able too as i am expected to go home for a couple weeks and i have to help my dad prepare for a kidney biopsy and a colonoscopy a couple days later.

eh well.

on the upside of things, i really like my job.

i applied as a van driver (oh so many months ago), and got hired as an astronomy lab assistant instead.

same pay, more hours/flexibility/knowledge, and i get to play around with telescopes (when it's not cloudy) and teach people how to use them.

how awesomely awesome is that?

speaking of telescopes.

it looks like another cloudy night :/

*sigh*

Posted by nessa at 19:59 | Permalink | Comments

this post is exclusively for blogger. not that anyone reads it, but incase they do... it's here for their reading pleasure.

- - -

yesterday while looking at the time on my phone, i noticed the date. march 10, 2007. on march 13, 2006 i quit my job of almost 5 years and moved away from a life i had known for almost 6 years.

i find it funny how life has worked itself out.

while i was working as a travel agent, i rarely travelled... well besides the weekend trips to my parents house or to grand rapids, i didn't get to go any place else. oh, well there was new orleans 3 years ago.. ah, that was fun.

after quitting and ending up stuck in del rio with no idea where to go or what to do once march 28th passed, i figured i'd find some other schools to apply to, and get a part time job in the mean time till it was time for the semester to begin.

my mom suggested that i don't get a job and that i go on vacation with them, and so my travels began.

we went to new mexico and visited places like las cruces, the city of rocks, silver city, and the gila cliff dwellings in the wilderness reserve. from there we ventured over to arizona through the apache national forest and up to holbrook arizona. i got to see the petrified forest and the painted desert, and my nephew really enjoyed it when he wasn't busy being cranky. we came back to new mexico, took a historic train ride in santa fe, passed through the panhandle of texas and into oklahoma where i got to see a bunch of relatives from my mom's side. total, the trip lasted for about 3 to 4 weeks, and i took a good 700+ pictures of our adventures.

after returning home, i started getting things ready for school, going to orientation, finding an apartment, registering for classes, etc. before i knew it, it was time to drive the 7 hour drive and move into the new place.

my first semester at unt wasn't too horribly bad. more than anything, i think it was a time for me to get comfortable and get back into the swing of things, as far as studying and stuff goes. the 2nd semester hasn't been going too bad, although there is one class that i could be doing better in. perpsectives on film. as fascinating as this may sound, i find that this class is dreadfully boring and i wouldn't be surprised if it was the class that will screw me out of my little scholarship.

christmas.

this past christmas was my first christmas away from my parents (trip paid for by them), but i was still with family... in mexico. even though i was sick on christmas, i still enjoyed it and i even got a pillow con un pato from one of my aunts that says "qua,qua, qua-nto te quiero..." too cute.

my funds are running low... really low, so i've finally decided to apply to a couple of jobs. the one i'm hoping to get would have me driving a van to and from our observatory every other day. while it can get redundant, the upside to all that is when i'm not driving, i can study and do homework. the days that the shift is for, would still allow me to volunteer at the campus tv station, where i'm currently doing audio for the news.

audio's been great, and i still have a lot to learn. i think i would have fallen flat on my face if ray wasn't there to help out. ray has such a big head since everyone apparently loves his ability to do audio and they keep telling him, so his ego sometimes crowds the studio. i'm surprised he still keeps coming twice a week since i hog up the board throughout all the blocks on tuesdays. thursdays though he's on his own. maybe after spring break i'll go and just sit there and press the play button on the cd player or something like he does on tuesdays.

tuesdays.

saturdays.

this past saturday was the 2nd saturday that i went to the christian students saturday meeting (they have some sort of meeting almost every day). i'm still kind of creeped out in some ways of their style of umm.. praising the lord and i still expect to look up from the book and see people running around in white sheets pretending to be ghosts. aside from that though, when they actually start reading verses and talking about them, i have found that they are quite informative.

speaking of readings.

i've started reading the bible and have made it halfway through genesis. quite an accomplishment for someone who hasn't really had any interest in reading the bible, attending church or any other religious type of events in many, many years.

anyhoo.

years ago, when things first didn't work out as planned, i was bitter. i loathed that which had hurt me for the longest time.

this time around... not so much.

i would have to say thanks to the guy who hates christmas because something bad always happens (karma?). thanks to the guy who said he'd never hurt me again.

if it weren't for you, i wouldn't be where i am today.

i wouldn't have been able to get to know my niece again in irving.. nor would i have met my cousins and seen my uncle in fort worth. i wouldn't have gone on vacation with my parents, or spent almost 10 days with my aunt (from new mexico) in mexico in december with relatives i hadn't seen since i was a little girl. i wouldn't have made the friends i have here in denton. and where else can i see snow one day, and have 60 degree weather the next? only in north texas.

at this particular moment, all i have left to say is...

to milo, thank you...

thank you for not loving me anymore.

Posted by nessa at 17:01 | Permalink | Comments

as of late it seems i've heard more and more about religion... well, perhaps not so much about religion as just about the bible and god.. good and evil... heaven and hell.

i suppose getting on mark's bus doesn't help, because i tend to ask questions about god, and if not that, then he brings up god. either way, it makes for an interesting bus ride when i end up on his bus.

anyhoo.

so, after having my 2 church dreams (one before, and one after the invitation to the bible thing), i haven't had that dream anymore (that i'm aware of anyway). i went to the bible study thingie (hadn't been to a bible study since 6th or 7th grade) and it was nothing like i had expected. when i think 'bible study' i think of people sitting around, reading, and talking/questioning what they read, then moving on to the next section.

when i arrived to my scheduled session, it seemed like the two older ladies were somewhat scared of me.. nervous perhaps? it was really odd. despite their unusual reaction to my being there, they started asking about my past experience with religion/church, why i quit going, what i did/didn't like about church, the reasons behind why i did/didn't like going to church, the reasons behind the reasons of why i stopped going to church, how i came up with the reasons as to why i quit going to church, etc. it just kept going, and going, with the occasional quote from the bible. sure, i understand if they want to get to 'know' a person they've just met, but it seemed a bit extreme for a 'simple' bible study.

it wasn't until the 2nd half of the session that they started talking about the beginning (genesis.. but not really), the concept of being saved, and once your saved from hell, you can't 'fall' off the ledge, but that you can only work way up (and they flashed a few bible quotes at me, so it must be true).

after that particular experience, i haven't had any real desire to go back. the person who had invited me (mark) apologized for the way things went as he himself didn't expect them to approach me the way they did.

today on the bus ride home, mark asked me why don't i go to the bible study thing again, read, and ask questions (since i apparently have asked a few on the bus rides to/from school), and have someone 'walk me through' it all. it wasn't so much that things went completely different from what i had expected, it was just the way things went in general. i felt awkward.. or uncomfortable with them. not sure which.

after that particular session, i did go to some breakfast thing later that week, where we ate, read, and discussed (the other people discussed), and everyone went on about their merry ways. i, however, got to talking to mark's wife and each time i'd get ready to leave, we'd (or her daughter would) seem to find something else to talk about. eventually though, i got to leave and come back home.

this past saturday i went to the christian students center group thing (the main meetings of those bible studies folks), and met some nice people. i felt awkward there at times, but not in the same way the other two ladies (who were also there, but no where within talking distance) had made me feel previously. when i arrived, everyone had started eating (i tried to eat, but some girl kept talking to me), after which they broke out their jammin' hymn books and started singing songs, followed by some reading from galations while tom (i think his name was tom) discussed it (of course, other people did too from time to time). i have to admit, that i did find what they had to say about those verses in galatians interesting.

what threw me off though was the way they would say 'thank you jesus'. when i was reading the song verses silently, i half expected to look up and see a bunch of people in white sheets with the eyes cut out, pretending to be ghosts. "thank you jeeeeeeeeeessssssuuuuuuuusssss." it had sort of a cheesy "ooooOOOOOOoooOOOOOoo" halloween ghost kind of feel to it. towards the beginning of people randomly saying their thank you's during/between songs, i almost burst out laughing as eddie izzard came to mind and his "holy ghost... hoooly ghooost." ah, eddie. he's grand.

"my relationship with you is through christ" is what mark told me this morning. he also said that he prayed for me before deciding to bring up the subject of christ in the first place (i guess it isn't a common thing for him to do with the riders of the bus), those few weeks ago. i had told him in the past that if it hadn't been for the dreams, i would've shot down his invite to any of the bible related things and the fact that i've actually attended 3 of them is.. was? completely out of character for me. i didn't tell him that this morning though, but that he already knows.

"i'm going to keep on praying" he says...

for me.

Posted by nessa at 19:51 | Permalink

i am listening to... imogen heap: headlock

word of the day... pontificate

i bought a cd the other day... it's from imogen heap "speak for yourself" and i kinda like it.

i also like the cd, "le fil", from camille even though it's in french. another cd i like that happens to be in french is "quelqu'un m'a dit" from carla bruni.

*sigh*

astronomy is boring and the exams are even worse.

i nap now. study later.

Posted by nessa at 15:50 | Permalink | Comments

i am listening to... muse: hysteria

word of the day... poltroon

i have no idea why i decided to log onto blogger, post a blog and change the appearance of the page. here i am anyway.

back in august i moved to a new city to attend college, which is what i am currently up to. school has been going alright and i'm happy that i'm back trying to learn, yet at the same time i'm not really all that happy and i don't know why.

as far as school goes, i'm taking what little is left of my "core" requirements (plus an extra class i really don't need in addition to what) the university says i still need before i can officially apply/declare my major. after this semester, the only "core" requirement that i need is to continue taking spanish for 3 more semesters (4 total, but i need 2 plus the other core requirements and pre-requisit courses before i can declare the major).

assuming that i miraculously end up in 2 of the (4) pre-requisite courses for my major, that gives me 10 hours planned out for next semester. i haven't decided whether or not i will leave it at the 10 hours which leaves me below full time and kills my scholarship's renewal (per the scholarships terms) and then i'd have to adjust the grants and whatever financial aid that i am getting because it was all calculated for my full time status (at least i get financial aid here). i could take an extra class, which would put me at 13 hours, but i don't really need the extra class unless i decide to declare a minor because then i could get a class in that minor but what do i want to minor in?i don't know just yet.

on the downside of things, because space is extremely limited in the 2 classes i am hoping to get into, there is a fairly strong possibility that i might not get into either one so then what do i take? i guess i could still find a minor to kill time till i do get into the course, or i could just find another major all together. i think maybe i'll just do the minor, although i don't know yet.

i miss my parents. i'm not able to just drive a couple hours to see them any weekend or day off like i used too, and paying over 250 bucks for a flight within the same state to me isn't cool. it's only a 7-8 hours drive, depending on which way i go and how much or how little i stop but that's still quite a drive. blah.

i have thought about transfering down south a bit to maybe austin or san marcos if it looks as though it'll take too long to even get into my major because i can only kill time for so long because i am so ready to finish with this whole school bit and get on doing something i want to do (or at least be trying to). i have thought of doing a different major, which would likely be geography or geology or maybe even geography with a minor in geology, in which case i would probably continue to get my master's and maybe even someday a phd.

crazy.

Posted by nessa at 16:43 | Permalink | Comments